Srila Prabhupada told the story of his sister. He said that soon after her marriage her husband led a life of debauchery. He stayed out late at night woman-hunting, drinking (attached to at least 2 or 3 of the 4 sinful principles). He was verbally abusive toward Prabhupada’s sister. When he came home at odd hours he would demand dinner be ready. Prabhupada said his sister continued to serve him.
She tolerated all non-sense and didn’t fight with him. (Although he was verbally abusive, if the wife tolerates and does not argue back, even such a low class man will not become physically abusive. Such men, will however, become physically abusive if the wife argues and fights back or acts unsubmissive). Prabhupada’s sister remained chaste and faithful and tolerated all non-sense.
Prabhupada says one day Prabhupada’s brother-in-law realized what a special jewel his wife actually was. He immediately realized how horrible he had been treating her. He turned his life around, and Prabhupada said he actually became surrendered to his wife after this. This is not just Indian culture It is human psychology, human nature. Such behavior is the same in any culture.
Every husband is certainly a great hero to his wife. In other words, if a woman loves a man, that man appears very beautiful and magnanimous. Unless one becomes beautiful in the eyes of another, one cannot dedicate his whole life to another. The husband is considered very magnanimous because he gives as many children to the wife as she likes. Every woman is fond of children; therefore any husband who can please his wife by sex and give her children is considered very magnanimous.
Not only does the husband become magnanimous by begetting children, but by giving his wife ornaments, nice food and dresses, he keeps her completely under submission. Such a satisfied wife will never give up the company of her husband. Manu-samhitä recommends that to keep a wife satisfied a husband should give her some ornaments because women are generally fond of home, ornaments, dresses, children, etc. In this way the woman is the center of all material enjoyment.